March 12, 2012

Feeling Alive

What makes you feel alive? I suppose there are many things that make me feel alive. But there is one thing in particular that makes me feel like nothing else. I got back to throwing pottery this weekend. It made me feel so alive! It's like something clicks inside me and I don't ever want to stop. I can sit in the same position for hours and not realize that hours have gone by. Of course when I go to stand up it all becomes clear that I haven't moved for hours.

Before this weekend I hadn't thrown pottery for a few months, which seemed like forever. I've been dreaming up all sorts of ideas of the things I wanted to make when I returned. I was afraid that I wouldn't remember how to do it though, you know the saying "if you don't use it you loose it." I always tell people it's not as easy as it looks. To me throwing pottery is very character building. There are so many steps to go through. You have to be patient, waiting for the pottery to dry, to just the right stage before you can trim it. If it's too soft then it will cave and if it's too hard then it will crack. Once it's trimmed you have to bisque fire it, then you have to glaze it, then you have to glaze fire it. That's just a minimal list of steps that are potentially gone through for one piece.

Even though I was nervous that I would have difficultly getting back into throwing pottery, I didn't, It felt so natural to have my fingers in that wet clay again. It just felt right. Do you have something that you do that feels that way? Isn't it such a gift! I couldn't help but cry as I sat there this weekend because I was so overwhelmed with feeling alive.

It's hard sometimes not to focus on all the things we wish were different. Like why am I living in Nebraska right now? Why do I have to be surrounded by flat farmland where everything looks the same? Why can't I own my own pottery studio? Why do I feel like a fish out of water? Why Why Why...?

Do I have the right to ask why? I believe everything has a purpose and as my heart begins to soften I see how truly blessed I am. When I was living in Colorado I didn't have a place to throw pottery. Here I've been led to a community where I can do what I love and can grow in my art. Where people are available to ask questions and remind me of things I forget like, "that piece you just worked hard to make a certain size is going to shrink by at least 20 percent." There's no way I would be learning as much or growing like this on my own.

We don't always know the purpose behind things and there will be seasons of life that include peaks and valleys. I'm so thankful that I have a Father who does know and who goes before me. He made me for a purpose and my job is not to question that purpose. My job is to put forth my entire self and to be willing to be used for whatever purpose I was made for.

I'm working on a new project that I'm super excited about. I'm getting a lot of good practice in by making pieces that are fat on the bottom and get smaller at the top. I've really got to take more pictures at the studio. It's really messy as you can imagine. I snapped the ones above real quick with my phone, that immediately got covered in dust.

There are so many parallels to our lives and to pottery. How lucky I am to be reminded so often! I pray that you are encouraged by these words and that you have a lovely start to your week.

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